Thursday, February 19, 2009

Bullshit Parade.

It is a proven scientific fact that thinking about something often causes it to happen. Some call this quantum physics. Others simply call it "faith." We ask that you open your mind to joining in with a unique psychic force that will change our lives through the power of thought.

Do you know what makes things happen? Doing things. I know, I too was amazed that there is often, frequently and sometimes observed link between cause and effect. It's spooky! When you do stuff, stuff will happen! Try making some toast - you will get delicious buttered toast! Try thinking about toast - you will almost certainly get hungry. It's science! It's full of scientifically-proven science! Oh, it's so scientific, you could rub yourself in it and people would mistake you for Alan Turing!

There is nothing like the faintest hint of a crisis to bring the charlatans hurtling out from under their stones. One effect I will guarantee from this gibberish - they will find some sort of vague market wobble, and attribute it to positive thinking. Then they will start asking for money.

Charlatans, quacks and crooks typically thrive in times of upheaval. We are suckers for miracle cures and quick fixes. These people aggravate me more than your common or garden buffoon, because their crookedness is so frequently dressed as piety. There is a cultishness to quackery, evinced recently with the MMR scare and similar nonsensical medical squeamishness. Now we have kids dying from easily preventable diseases, more and more people are getting illnesses that were almost extinct a decade ago, and there is still not one documented link between MMR and autism.

If you imagine positive thinking is going to save the world, try imagining what actual contribution might achieve. If you think that Jenny McCarthy knows more about medicine than your doctor, then I feel very sorry for your children. And if you thought that it would be cute to play on the terms 'herd immunity' and 'following the herd' then congratulations, because you have directly contributed to the deaths of several children, an increase in the rates of communicable disease in Europe and the US. And since the anti-MMR movement is so intrisically linked to new-age "medicine", I feel that I should point out that positive thinking will have all the effect that it always has - fuck all.

I sense a theme coming on.

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